I... forgot how to walk... Oh well, after one week limping cause of tendon strain, now I simply have to learn how to walk again. I feel like a baby man! Actually my leg ok already (after the doctor PAINFULLY twisted it back) but because I forgot how I used to walk, I still limp. Haiz... Monday, Tuesday. Wednesday I could walk. But Thursday, even lying on my bed quietly was so painful! I tossed and turned from 5 - 9 a.m. before I went to see to the doctor with so many staring eyes directed at me. I feel like staring back at them and demanding, "What see see, jealous izzit?" But well, can't really blame them. How many people my age walk like I did, honestly?

I've been feeling so depressed lately. The common tests were near hell and after I sit for the papers, I know for sure that I'm gonna fail. I didn't have time to finish for all my papers. That makes time management my main problem. Second would be last minute studying. I really need to pull up my socks (all the way to my head) if I wanna get to MJC or TJC. I must do something, REAL SOON! Most of my friends are doing much better than me. Class tests, NAPFA and all. Yes there are people doing not as well as me, but still... We received our A-Maths paper already and... eventhough I improved, I failed only by two marks and some of my marks were gone because of careless mistakes but... I know I could have done better if I'd studied earlier and practised. That was like the easiest paper I sat for and yet, I failed... But I know I can do it. I just need some time and someone who can push me into doing my work.

Home alone now... My dad's at work and so is my second brother. My eldest brother at Mendaki and my mum at a Mothers' Day function. Oh well... There's my malicious black cat, Malice 'keeping me company' by running away the second she catches sight of me.

My comp's just been reformatted because it's was infected by so many viruses. There goes my lovely files and pictures... So sad, but the reformat was necessary.

I dunno whether I should cut my hair or not. With short hair, I can wash it everyday and not the routine 3 times a week. I'd feel much lighter and not so burdened by so many things. But with long hair, I can style it however I want it to be like. Just letting it loose feels so great. Maybe it's just that I fear I'd look funny with a haircut. My schoolmates remember me with long hair. I cut my hair in Sec 1 and has been keeping it ever since. I'm in Sec 4 now, it should be about 3 years already. I wanted to just cut my hair after my 'O' levels but almost everyone is cutting their hair and they look nice and fresh. I've always wanted to have the longest hair in class and I've achieved that in my Malay class. In my form class, only Christine has hair as long as if not longer than mine. I dunno larz...

After 16 years on Earth, I've yet to find something I'm talented in. I can't play any musical instrument fluently, I can't sing nor dance nor act well. I can't write poems or stories. I can't even talk spontaneously fluently. I don't even do well in my studies. I really have no idea what I wanna be when I grow up. Ok, maybe I do have some ideas, but can I achieve them. I don't really believe much in chance.

Conclusion: I'm so insignificant! I live my life because I have to. I'm just following the flow of each day.

I'm gonna study Chem now. I wanna get at least one distinction... Happy Belated Birthday Fazillah and Sharon... Happy Birthday Si Hui... Happy Early Birthday Marcus...